A Clueless Person's Lair

2018 Year Ender

Monday, December 31, 2018

Wow it’s been many years since I’ve written a year ender. 😱

So let’s recap 2018…

1. We now have a total of 9 cats in and around the house. Trixie and Cooper are our inside cats. Trixie came to us in late 2016 and Cooper in late 2017. Outside we have Buster, Tommy, Mini, Cindy, Spike, Pepper and Ginger. The last 3 are kittens so we are looking to have them adopted. Rescuing cats does get pricey but what’s the alternative? Let them die? Our conscience can’t handle that.

2. Come next May I would be married 5 years and Rob has been here in Kuching for almost 4 years. We’ve gotten along fine most of the time but I will not deny it was a challenge in the beginning to experience living together for such an extended time. We were used to being together 3 months at the most during visits so it took some adjusting to each other’s quirks. So yeah 99 percent of the time we’re good and happy. Since there isn’t a perfect marriage, we are not without arguments or disagreements but we tend to work through them together.

3. Work is work. The only thing that saved me from just being completely burnt out was getting a promotion. I went through the process in 2017 and I received the confirmation letter in April. Of course alongside with a pay raise, it also means I have additional responsibility now and am expected to produce more. It was nice to get the promotion and feel like what I’ve done was validated. I guess the next thing to do is to get a PhD.

4. Family life is alright. I feel like I’m closer with my parents now particularly my mom ever since I moved out. I look forward to meet up with them and just talk and just to spend time together.

5. In terms of travelling, we spent a month back in Chicago just soaking up the food. We didn’t do anything special and just hung out with the in-laws. It was truthfully a relaxing month to be away from work and enjoying the fruits of my raise from my promotion which came at the perfect timing. That was the only travelling we did this year because it wiped out a lot of savings. Heh

I think that’s all I got for now. I better post this up before I forget. 😂

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Happy New Year!

Monday, January 1, 2018

It’s the first day of 2018 and I have to say it’s been a good start. We spent the whole day lazying at home, watching TV and even took a nap. These days I truly appreciate times like this. 

I made scrambled eggs for lunch and we finally emerged from the house for dinner. 😂😂😂

Another reason why it’s been a good day is…

Durian always make me happy. It seems that durian season is upon us. So many roadside stalls are popping up. Finally today, my dad bought some so I’m a happy camper.

And of course my dear husband complains about the smell over and over again. But that’s ok, it means more for me! 😀

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HELLO HELLO!!

Saturday, October 14, 2017

OMG it’s been forever since I thought to post on my blog. 

My last post was 2013?!?!

So major changes in my life since then. We got married in 2014 in a beautiful intimate ceremony at the Chicago Botanic Gardens which was a dream come true. 

Then in 2015, Rob moved over to Kuching. Before he arrived I spent the previous 4 months prepping the house for our move. Two months after his arrival here, we had a wedding reception for family and close friends. 

And now our home has become a sanctuary for stray cats. LOL. 

Anyway I thought it was important that I posted something after all these years. And since I have the WordPress app on my phone now, it should be easier to update.

That’s all for now!

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2013 Year Ender

Tuesday, December 31, 2013

Once again this is my obligatory year ender post…

How was my 2013?

Let’s start with the ups.

1. I went to Chicago to visit Rob for 4 weeks. We went on a mini road trip to visit a friend of mine in Wisconsin and as always road trips with Rob are awesome fun. We are planning on another visit for me next year in April/May.
2. ROB PROPOSED! It’s quite a story but to cut it short, he took me to the Sears/Willis Tower in downtown Chicago, got on one knee on one those sky ledges and asked me to marry him. I, of course, said YES (after face-palming from embarrassment – there were a lot of people watching us). This explains kinda why we’re planning on trip for me back to go back. Apparently  marrying a foreigner is a f*cking pain in the ass in this country so we’re thinking about getting the legal aspect of it settled there instead of going through the stupid bureaucratic bullshit here.
3. I GOT A WEDDING DRESS! It was on sale and I scored it for USD$99! Eventually I will get around to blogging about the story behind the dress (I hope).
4. I lost weight and gained it back and then some while visiting Rob. I came home and lost it all and then some. I’m happy to say I’m lighter than last year so I’m going to keep it up and try to lose more!
5. The house is coming along. It has been locked for a couple of months now so I haven’t been able to visit and check out the construction as much as I used to.
6. Added a new member to the family, Toby the Rottweiler.

Downs:

1. Leo, my dog of almost 10 years died.
2. Car fixes which have amounted to almost RM1k (which this can also be an “up” because it could’ve cost me more).
3. Gotten sick more times this year than any other years I think, mostly BAD food poisoning. Like puking my brains out and high fevers kinda food poisoning.
4. I would’ve love to save more but I didn’t so I guess that’s one thing I’m not too happy about.
5. Work bums me out sometimes (like last year) and there seems to be more drama in the workplace. Office politics sucks!
6. I’ve had friendships come and go, nothing I can do about it. I can’t control other people and how they behave or think.

That’s all for now!

Bye!

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Quick update

Sunday, July 14, 2013

In the world of smartphones, I’ve finally realized to download the wordpress app that is allowing me to blog via my phone right now.

I’ve had a smartphone for a couple of years now. I just don’t utilize it to its full capability.

Anyway quick update on what’s going on in my life.

I visited Rob in Chicago last month and stayed there roughly a month. While I was there…he proposed!!!

That’s all I got for now, bye!

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2012 Year Ender

Monday, December 31, 2012

Yes yes, I have not written in eons so this is my obligatory year ender post.

How was my 2012?

Well, for one the world didn’t end so that’s a good thing, I guess…

Like every other year, 2012 has been filled with ups and downs. Let’s start with the ups.

1. Rob came to visit for 3 months, March-June.
2. We went on our first out-of-the-country trip together to Phuket and had a blast, with a brief stop in KL. Phuket was FABULOUS! Definitely wanna go back again.
3. Bought myself my first semi-pro camera, the Olympus Pen. It’s pretty awesome!
4. Lost some weight, although most of it was gained while Rob was here so I guess I’m back to square one. *shrug*
5. Bought a house and it will be ready by end of 2013 or early 2014. Nothing fancy, just a simple double-storey intermediate terrace house. Damn real estate in Kuching is getting so expensive! Price went up 10k in a matter of 2 weeks. Full story on that some other time (This point is half an “up” and a “down”).
6. It’s fun talking with Rob about what we want for the house, i.e decor, appliances etc.
7. Finally got a computer at work so that means I don’t have to lug my laptop up 3 floors everyday.
8. Got into the habit of going for morning walks before work when possible.

Downs:

1. Sold my soul to the bank AKA bought a house. This means less money going to retail therapy. *sadface*
2. Work bums me out sometimes, mainly due to the people I have to work with.
3. Lacking weekends because it seems I’m working more on weekends these days.
4. When I work weekends, it means I can’t sleep in as much as I used to.
5. Issues of faith, which I shall not go into details here.
6. Issues of spirituality…kinda related to above mentioned point.
7. Car fixes which have amounted to almost RM1k (which this can also be an “up” because it could’ve cost me more).

That’s about all I can think of right now.

Anyhow, I’m going to head to bed before the fireworks go crazy but I think there won’t be much going on because it’s raining quite heavily right now. For that I am HAPPY!

Happy New Year and have a fantastic 2013!

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Good enough

Sunday, October 14, 2012

Being good enough…does it really exist?

For as long as I’ve lived I’ve battled the guilt of not being good enough, in every aspect of my life.

Am I a good enough daughter?
Am I a good enough girlfriend?
Am I a good enough friend?
Am I a good enough student?
Am I a good enough employee?
Am I a good enough believer?
Am I a good enough person?

But does being good enough exist?

Despite my many attempts to be good enough (or try to be), I always realized that in the end that I tend to fall short.

Is it because I’ve placed too high expectations on myself? Or is it because I think I’ve never been able to meet the expectations of others of me?

In the end, does it really matter whose expectations they are?

I mean we live in a world where humans (in general) are never satisfied with what they have. We always want more money, more things, more power, more clothes, more shoes, more popularity, more love, more looks, more spirituality, more kindness, more understanding, more patience, more talent, more faith…it goes on and on and on.

Which brings me back to my initial question…

If we are never satisfied, how can we ever be good enough for other people as well as ourselves? Are we humans doomed to chase the unattainable because there is no end to the “more…”?

And if the “more…” is out of reach, when do we or should we even stop trying to be “more…”?

If we stop trying, we’re not good enough but if we keep trying we’re not good enough either! So why bother trying when you know you’re going to get disappointed in the end?

Perhaps I am being too pessimistic/negative.

So the conclusion that can be drawn from my current deduction is simple (and I can only speak for myself);

I will never be good enough. Period.

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Year ender

Saturday, December 24, 2011

So Christmas is tomorrow and we’re a a week away from 2012.

To be completely honest, I can’t wait for 2011 to be over. Other than Rob being here for the first couple months of 2011, this year has been a drag. I guess you can’t always expect things to be perfect. I digress…

Anyway my absence from the “blogging world” can be best explained by any or all of the following reasons:

1. Work takes up most of my time, even when I’m not at work I’m at home thinking what I need to do at work the next day so blogging about it is just boring.
2. Emotions have been running high since Rob left so instead of posting sappy mushy or unhappy sad posts, I just try to sort things on my own. Besides, there are things I rather not share with the world.
3. When I go in to my WordPress thinking I should write a post here and there, I have nothing interesting better to say other than “Work sucks”, “People at work drive me insane”, “It’s pissing cats and dogs outside”, “Got a new phone”, “Got an office” etc. You get my drift.
4. I don’t take as many photos as I used to so my blog posts will be boring without visual aid. (Maybe a new camera would get me motivated  :P)
5. Even if I do take pictures, I’m just so lazy to upload them on Photobucket (which I don’t know if my account is still alive because it’s been inactive for SO long) and then attach the html codes here (which I think there should be an easier way to do that now but I’m just too lazy to find out).
6. When I do come up with some lame post, I somehow (and this has happened more than once) accidently click a button and lose my post. No, I don’t know how it happened.

Anyhooooooo, even though I’m not blogging as much I still do read some blogs once in  while. Most of my free time is spent on Facebook so close friends and family know what I’m up to these days. I also still tweet but it’s just very random things.

I’m on leave until after the new year. I get 25 vacation days a year and to show you how work has taken a lot of my time, I have 18 days left.

I celebrated the last year in my 20s last month and I intend to have a good year ahead so here’s to a fantastic 2012!

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year everyone!

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Got an office

Saturday, August 20, 2011

Dear blog,

I can now officially say that now I have an office, not all to myself but I’m sharing it with someone. I suppose it’s not so bad sharing because then I won’t feel so lonely.

Been sprucing up the room this past week. Let’s just say the initial condition on the office was BLECH but I think it looks so much better now.

Will post up pictures soon.

Me.

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Broken

Tuesday, August 9, 2011

It’s funny…

I think I’m a vocal person. Words tend to just fly out of my mouth.

Yet when I’m quiet, people around me know something is wrong.

I lost count of the number of people who asked me if I was ok.

I lost count of the number of people who told me to sleep more.

I lost count of the number of people who said I look stressed.

I lost count of the number of people who asked why I looked so sad.

It’s funny…

After so long (that’s subjective) of feeling whole,

I feel like I’m broken again…

Into pieces that I don’t think I can put back.

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